Fifteen years after first wondering about my relationship with alcohol, I finally stopped drinking in May of 2018. During those 15 years of private alarm and “moderate, socially acceptable” nightly drinking, I explored an array of views about addiction and recovery, learning something from each, but I didn’t stop drinking…

On the outside, I look pretty much the same, but inside, I’m evolving in ways I never expected — It’s 4 a.m., and I’m wide awake—not with dread or shame, or even an alcohol-induced dry mouth or headache. I stay in bed a bit. It’s winter here and warm beneath the heavy blankets, but eventually, I decide to get up and write this piece. Last year, I finally stopped…

It was only after I walked away from alcohol that people thought I needed help — I finally stopped using the addictive, carcinogenic drug ethanol, known by its street name alcohol, three months ago (May 2018). I’m not counting the days anymore. Not really. Because that would be the same as counting the days of the rest of my life. But still, I know it’s been…

Of marriage, the philosopher Alan de Botton has written, “Marriage: a hopeful, generous, infinitely kind gamble taken by two people who don’t know yet who they are or who the other might be, binding themselves to a future they cannot conceive of and have carefully omitted to investigate.” My husband…

A response to Gary Greenberg’s op-ed, Should Therapists Write About Patients? — In an op-ed for the New York Times, psychotherapist and author Gary Greenberg recounts a recent mishap in writing about his patients. After obtaining consent and/or taking elaborate attorney-approved steps to render his patients’ stories unrecognizable even to themselves, Greenberg published about some of his work with patients. Despite his…

Prior to leaving town for the Thanksgiving holiday, I felt profoundly lonely. Then I went away, visited with my brother, sister-in-law, and my nephews over the holiday, and didn’t feel lonely. When I got back home, the loneliness was waiting for me. Science tells us that loneliness is toxic to…